by Carmen Van Kerckhove

About a year ago, I attended a marketing seminar. The woman who ran the seminar couldn’t have been more different from me. She was a real “girly-girl,” all pink, sparkles, big blonde hair.

I was apprehensive at first, but by the end of the event she had completely won me over. Why? Because I could tell she was totally comfortable in her skin. This was really who she was, and she was unabashed about it.

The ability to just be yourself is a lot harder to come by than we might think. And one of the biggest obstacles can be race. Specifically, racial stereotypes.

I’m not particularly meek, yet at almost every job I’ve held, people have thought of me as a shy and quiet Asian girl. Because of that, I’ve always had to project an exaggerated version of my personality, just to be perceived as normal.

What kinds of racial stereotypes do you find yourself battling on a daily basis? What elements of your authentic self are you suppressing? How is race getting in the way of your self-expression without you even knowing it?

I’m going to share that and much more on a FREE CALL happening TOMORROW, Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 1:00 pm Eastern time.

‘Just Be Yourself!’
How Race Gets in the Way of Expressing Our Authentic Identities

Sign up to reserve your line for this FREE call today!

On this lively, information-packed 60-minute call, you’ll learn:

• How the quest for racial or cultural authenticity can thwart your true identity.
• What “covering” is, and what it has to do with your civil rights.
• Why it actually benefits you to know what racial stereotypes exist about your ethnic or racial group.

This call is a content-rich preview to the newest session of my program, The Racialicious Experience. If you’re a fan of our blog, you won’t want to miss it!

Limited lines are available for this call, so you’ll want to make sure you reserve your spot right away.

Just click the link above, enter your information in the boxes on the page, and you’ll receive the complete call details via email.

We will record the call, but only people who have registered will receive instructions on how to download the audio recording. So even if you’re not sure if you can make the call live, register now!

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

We started Sean on solid foods a couple weeks ago. It’s strange to think that eating from a spoon is a skill that needs to be learned, but it is. It took her a couple tries to get the hang of it, but as you can see, she’s eating like a champ now!

Oddly, I found myself getting really emotional the first time we fed her. I’ve been breastfeeding her since birth, and I think that maybe on some level, I felt as if Sean starting solid foods was the first step to not needing her mother anymore.

I suspect it won’t be the last time I feel this way. It seems to me that much of parenting is about preparing your children to go out in the world on their own and coming to terms with letting them go.

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

It’s amazing how quickly this summer flew by. Fall is definitely in full swing, as I’m headed out on the road again for speaking engagements. I’ll be in Boston this week for two events that are open to the public. Be sure to say hi to me if you come!

Friday, October 2
Workshop: “Love and Sex: What’s Race Got to Do With It?”
Stonehill College in Easton, MA
Contact the Intercultural Affairs office for time and location

Saturday, October 3
Keynote at 2009 Asian America Women in Leadership Conference
Boston University in Boston, MA
Register at this web site

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

Addicted to Race is New Demographic’s podcast about America’s obsession with race. Here’s a rundown of what you’ll find in this episode:

What role did race play in the media coverage of Annie Le’s murder? Gospel tours bring in much-needed revenue for black churches, but is it worth it vis-a-vis the racial tourism? What’s wrong with calling a multiracial person “half” Chinese? What role does race play in street harassment of women?

Carmen Van Kerckhove, Tami Winfrey Harris and Jen Wang discuss; and Angry Asian Man Phil Yu and Racialicious Special Correspondent Wendi Muse make surprise guest appearances!

Addicted to Race is broadcast live every Sunday afternoon at 12 pm Eastern. You can listen live on our BlogTalkRadio page and call in by dialing 347-996-3958.

Right-click here to download an MP3 of Addicted to Race Episode 119
or
Click here to never miss an episode by subscribing to us in iTunes
or
click the button below to play it immediately

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by Carmen Van Kerckhove

About a year ago, I attended a marketing seminar. The woman who ran the seminar couldn’t have been more different from me. She was a real “girly-girl,” all pink, sparkles, big blonde hair.

I was apprehensive at first, but by the end of the event she had completely won me over. Why? Because I could tell she was totally comfortable in her skin. This was really who she was, and she was unabashed about it.

The ability to just be yourself is a lot harder to come by than we might think. And one of the biggest obstacles can be race. Specifically, racial stereotypes.

I’m not particularly meek, yet at almost every job I’ve held, people have thought of me as a shy and quiet Asian girl. Because of that, I’ve always had to project an exaggerated version of my personality, just to be perceived as normal.

What kinds of racial stereotypes do you find yourself battling on a daily basis? What elements of your authentic self are you suppressing? How is race getting in the way of your self-expression without you even knowing it?

I’m going to share that and much more on a FREE CALL happening on Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 1:00 pm Eastern time.

‘Just Be Yourself!’
How Race Gets in the Way of Expressing Our Authentic Identities

Sign up to reserve your line for this FREE call today!

On this lively, information-packed 60-minute call, you’ll learn:

• How the quest for racial or cultural authenticity can thwart your true identity.
• What “covering” is, and what it has to do with your civil rights.
• Why it actually benefits you to know what racial stereotypes exist about your ethnic or racial group.

This call is a content-rich preview to the newest session of my program, The Racialicious Experience. If you’re a fan of our blog, you won’t want to miss it!

Limited lines are available for this call, so you’ll want to make sure you reserve your spot right away.

Just click the link above, enter your information in the boxes on the page, and you’ll receive the complete call details via email.

We will record the call, but only people who have registered will receive instructions on how to download the audio recording. So even if you’re not sure if you can make the call live, register now!

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

Last week, a friend of mine posted this Associated Press article on my Facebook wall.

I was struck by the fact that the article included several different definitions of “racism,” but not a single one bore any resemblance to the way most anti-racists would define it.

In other words, the article promotes the notion that racism is about personal prejudice, or a belief in the superiority of one race over another, but doesn’t at all cover the systemic or institutional nature of racism.

I believe that one of the reasons anti-racism hasn’t taken off the way we’d like it to, has to do with this very issue of terminology. How can anti-racists and laypeople talk to each other about race when they have completely different ideas of what “racism” is supposed to be? No wonder people roll their eyes when they hear things like “people of color can’t be racist.” If you don’t know the anti-racist definition of racism, that statement makes absolutely no sense.

Some of my fellow anti-racist activists and bloggers would argue that it’s up to the general public to educate themselves on Racism 101, and that we can’t be responsible for people’s wilful ignorance.

But if you don’t even realize you’re missing knowledge in this area, how are you supposed to seek to learn it? And even if you are sufficiently motivated to go out and educate yourself, many race-related resources out there just aren’t that user-friendly.

(Even Dr. Beverly Tatum’s classic Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? — arguably one of the most accessible books out there on race — takes nearly a whole chapter to define what “racism” is.)

Again, I have a few colleagues who’d say: “Oh cry me a river. So you have to wade through a few dense, academic texts. What’s that compared to the oppression that people of color have faced for centuries?”

Well, of course there’s no comparison. But if we really want to create change when it comes to race, why not make it easier for people to learn? I see nothing wrong with trying to make the topic more accessible, and even to some degree, entertaining.

I’m glad to see that many of you, judging from your responses to my recent book survey, feel the same way. No matter what kind of book I end up writing, you can be sure that it will contain plenty of humor, pop culture references, and personal anecdotes.

On a side note, I’m not convinced that it’s even possible for us to take the anti-racist definition of “racism” mainstream. It seems to me that the idea of racism as personal prejudice is too firmly entrenched in popular language already. Maybe it’s time to create a new word to describe the idea of a system of advantage based on race?

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

Addicted to Race is New Demographic’s podcast about America’s obsession with race. Here’s a rundown of what you’ll find in this episode:

What impact did Vogue Evolution — an openly gay dance crew featuring a trans woman — have on MTV’s America’s Best Dance Crew? When Kanye West protested Taylor Swift winning a VMA over Beyonce, did race have anything to do with it? What does it say about race and gender in Hollywood that Tyler Perry has been tapped to write, direct, and produce a film based on Ntozake Shange’s choreopoem “For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When The Rainbow is Enuf?” Is there an upside to being an Annoying Parent when it comes to diversity at your child’s school? Carmen Van Kerckhove, Tami Winfrey Harris and Thea Lim discuss.

Addicted to Race is broadcast live every Sunday afternoon at 12 pm Eastern. You can listen live on our BlogTalkRadio page and call in by dialing 347-996-3958.

Click here to never miss an episode by subscribing to us in iTunes
or
click here to play it immediately

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

Addicted to Race is New Demographic’s podcast about America’s obsession with race. Here’s a rundown of what you’ll find in this episode:

Did Obama’s speech on healthcare make a difference? Did racism play a role in the pressure for Van Jones to resign? A web site attempts to diversify the world of swinging, but ends up being a big #diversityfail. Tyra showed us her real hair – has she singlehandedly resolved the politics of black women and hair? Tami Winfrey Harris and Andrea Plaid discuss.

Addicted to Race is broadcast live every Sunday afternoon at 12 pm Eastern. You can listen live on our BlogTalkRadio page and call in by dialing 347-996-3958.

Click here to never miss an episode by subscribing to us in iTunes
or
click here to play it immediately

by Carmen Van Kerckhove

I have a confession.

For the past few months I’ve been trying to wrap my brain around starting a book proposal. But I’m having a really hard time figuring out what kind of book I want to write.

It’ll be about race, of course. That much I know. But beyond that, I’m struggling with pinning down my idea. One day I’ll be absolutely sure I want to write a sort of “the state of race in America today” book. The next day, I’ll be more into the idea of writing a primer on race. The week after that, I’ll be convinced that a memoir is the way to go.

I have no shortage of ideas, no shortage of things I want to say. It’s just the exercise of wrestling it into some kind of framework… that’s the part I’m finding most challenging.

In short, I need some help.

I would really, really appreciate it if you would take 15 minutes out of your day to fill out this survey.

The more detail you can provide, the more helpful you’ll be. Also, when thinking of other books on race that you’ve read in the past, please don’t limit them to non-fiction books. If you’ve read novels or memoirs that deal with race in a significant way, please include those as well.

Thank you so much! YOU are the audience for this book, so I want to make sure I deliver what you need and want.